Monday, October 10, 2011

143



     Dad fifteen miles offshore, calling while he still can but i never pick up. Leaves a message on my answering machine, saying TE QUIERO ALLY, WATCH YOUR BACK ALWAYS. DESEO QUE ESTES AQUI. These mobile phones replacing that old radio we had on the beach, when my sister and i were blond as day, shrieking into our hands, and mom would fax our crappy drawings through space and water, dad saying MISS MY GIRLS, TE QUIERO. He didn't know we were drawing on the walls too, and mom was kissing her cavegirls, the london bridge falling down each night.
     Only the surface has changed....we're still going the same way, all as we have been. I'll swim with you

Thursday, October 6, 2011

      I am so angry..all the more for i know i have no right to feel it...i have hurt so many people. i made this bed of nails, and dancing on it wonder aloud why do my feet bleed? why does it hurt me to move so? i am not still as i need to be.. but i have been submissive enough so that now i am stepping on the nails out of spite, spitting in my palm.

  I went back there to give you back to yourself. upon placing that plain black t-shirt in your hand, you checked the nape of my neck and we both saw at the same time that part of you i didn't return. i was trying to give you back but i was still wearing you. i was wearing what i kept.

    Why was woman made so fickle? We destroy ourselves when we destroy them..i remember that sad way you looked at me the night i sneaked out through your bedroom window...i felt so wild, hopeless out there in the street. but time brought with it the fruition of my fears, and i have now those puppy eyes. dark mirrors reflecting the way the wheel goes, goes backwards all the while






Sunday, October 2, 2011

Been dancing in the dark so long the light hurts my eyes...i'm pulling a woolen blanket over my head, tricking strangers into taking it off. Put your hand back over my mouth......."Children should be seen and not heard"